Today is a bad day.

[Gemma90]

I've woke up today and after a few weeks where my eye has felt great, i've been feeling the dryness/soreness/fullness again and its really getting me down this time because I realise how much better I felt these few weeks. It makes me realise how life could have been for me now if this problem hadn't come about. Of course theres alot of other things I would need to work on, I was depressed and suffering low confidence before this started. But I know if this physical discomfort were to go away how hard I would try to get back on track because I now see that life has the potential to be good, I like my job, I love my family and my friends. But I could loose even that so fast because of MGD because for me it just accelerates my depression.

I've broke down at work before and ended up telling my boss that I was putting up with a chronic dry eye condition, but she didn't seem to really understand. And tbh, my perfomance at work does suffer if im having a really bad eye day because I can't think of anything else. Occationally i've thought that maybe I should leave my job, try get on sickness and work on sorting this out but I like where I work at the moment. I just think i'd really regret it but on days like today where I feel I would rather die than put up with this for any longer at my young age, I know that it could be what I need, to take time off and concentrate on me.

My family and friends don't understand either. And I don't expect them to really. If I think back to when my eyes felt 'normal', and someone kept complaining that they had really dry eyes, i'd probably think the same as they do 'Just use drops?'. I don't even think my doctor understands!

I sometimes just can't believe where im at. Nearly two and a half years ago I had just lost my confidence. I never thought i'd ever be as low as I was back then but here I am now, living with pain and discomfort everyday and struggling to hold onto my job and my friends. Im in such a bad place, and I have some days that are better than others, but I really hope that this isn't going to continue to be a downward spiral for me because I can't remember the last time I felt completely alright.

[lizlou29]

I'm feeling the same way too today. I feel as if I'm just existing but at the moment it feels like a pointless existence as I struggle through work (really don't want to leave my job) then I can't do all the things I used to on the weekend. I basically sit at home waiting for my boyfriend to come back and have to get him to do food shopping for me. I have ok days occasionally but I desperately want my old life back where I don't have to turn invites down and can go shopping, cinema etc.

I've tried to make people at work understand the situation but no one really gets it. They think if I'm there I must be ok but like you I like my job and want to keep it.

True friends will still always be your friend but I understand you feel that your friendships can't stay the same if you can't do all the things you used to. My friends know that they basically have to come to my flat to see me and they try to be understanding. I'm a bit older than you and all my friends are in good jobs, getting married, having kids and I feel my life is at a standstill.

I too suffered from depression in the past and thought I'd never feel that low again. I guess I feel more desperate than depressed now.

I think we have to look at other people's stories and see how they have improved over time. This forum has been so helpful to me, with both trearments that I didn't know existed as well as encouragement from other members.

Are you taking anti-depressants and/or having counselling? Staying on top of it is so important.

I really hope you start having more good days soon.

[nicolasdu92130]

totally feel you man since its been 1.5 years that im struggling with severe dry eyes, doing everything i can to get relief but nothing work. totally depressed about it and how it has taken evry enjoyment i could have, now im just full of frustration and anger, cause im only 20 and 1 year without any party, or any hapinness whatsoever is very very hard. right now im at school, and everyday i can see normal people of my age having fun while im just miserable...

depression is very very ***** but can't be better morally without my eyes havin a relief. anti depressant or a no-no cause if my eyes get any drier will reallly become crazy...

[Gemma90]

Ahh guys im glad people can relate. Its the hardest thing i've ever had to put up with in my life, and im scared aswell. It is hard to socialise when your in pain, I found it hard over the summer being in Beer Gardens for some reason of an evening, I think because of people smoking? I don't smoke, but my eyes were really effected when sat outside.

I have been on anti depressants before when I was 18 in 2009, and they did make me feel better. Then I came off them during a bad time cause I felt so bad I didn't see how they were helping. Then after my hormones seemed to go a bit off I tried to go back on the same anti depressant and for some reason I would have insomnia whilst on them this time, any other anti depressant the same too, I can't function without sleep. Currently been on St Johns Wort for about 3 weeks so hopefully i'll feel abit better soon but when im in dry eye pain or discomfort, I don't think any anti depressant will help me there, I feel terrible either way.

Sometimes when im out with my friends, I look at them and almost envy the fact that they can be out and about and do things and their eyes never even cross their mind. Not that i'd ever want them to know how it feels I just want to be like them again and live my life.

[farmgirl]

I am seeing the same theme repeating over and over again here. It's bad enough being 60+ years old and having this problem, my heart breaks for you young people.

I do know one thing though, my WileyX moisture chamber sunners have really given me my life back, and with dark lenses they are not even ugly. Without them I wouldn't even be able to go outside for any length of time even with dark glasses because ANY air movement is killer for me. With my WileyX glasses I can even drive my convertible comfortably. They make a world of difference so if you have never tried them I highly recommend them. I have a pair of clear (albeit ugly) ones that I need to take for indoor events like the philharmonic or Cirque du Soleil as there is way too much air movement in those venues for me even though they are indoors.

Anyhow if you don't have them I highly recommend you get yourselves a pair....cheers...F/G

[Guest]

Anyhow if you don't have them I highly recommend you get yourselves a pair....cheers...F/G

I agree - glasses like these make an enormous difference.

I wear the sunglasses Wiley's almost everywhere, even indoors at work.

For public occasions where I need clear lenses, I either wear my custom moisture chambers or my MEG's. I have a brown pair similar to what's in the pic at that link). Interestingly, when I used to wear my MEG's more, if I wore a good outfit and did my hair well, I'd actually get complimented on them lol ... shocking to me, but a nice surprise all the same. I guess if you fake being fashionable some people will be fooled and assume the unusual glasses are a new trend???