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  • Big Loss

    I get so upset at time because of my dry eyes. I had a wonderful life and job until dry eye hit. Literally everything was finally going well for me. Unfortunately I never appreciated what I had till it was gone. Now I look back and get so sad of the freedom I had and mostly the innocence I had. Like any 25 yr old I was obssessed about clothes and boys not about health. I miss those days greatly. I miss my nivity about life. I miss the biggest worry being what to wear and not how r my eyes going to react given this environment. I know I will never get back to that place now or ever again. I fear constantly about the future since I can nolonger financialy support myself. I can't even drive any longer so I have to rely on people constantly which I hate. How will anyone love me considering what a nuisance I am?

    I just needed to vent to people who can relate.

    Best wishes to all
    Kim
    If life is a bowl of cherries, then why I am I stuck in the pits!

  • #2
    Kim,

    Yes, most of us understand that big loss. But in life, there is plenty of loss...not just health related. Fortunately, we have the God-given freedom to make the most of what we do have, and hopefully make the joys in life outweigh the lousy stuff.

    How to do this is certainly not easy or obvious, but I believe is possible...even with debilitating dry eye. It is particularly sweet to persevere through adversity, and it makes us proud and strong.

    And yes, someone will love you for this. Someone will love you for you, for your smile, strength, sense of humor and happiness in the face of adversity and despite those traits that might make you what you consider a nuisance.

    What is less attractive to people are those who carry on about what they do not have. I am not stating that this will be easy, nor do I blame you in the least for feeling low. This eye discomfort is one heck of a burden.

    During my worst struggles, a relative of mine reminded me that life was not meant to be easy. Indeed, she was correct.

    But, pressing on through all of it is worth it. There are so many out there doing just that. Everyone out there carries a cross, even when it's not obvious.

    You will get your life back, Kim. I don't know when or how, but you will.

    Diana
    Never play leapfrog with a unicorn.

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    • #3
      Pity Party

      Thanks Diana. I am working on trying to get better. I have seen every shrink on the east coast practically. It is a hard road but I am trying. I just get so down from time to time particuarly when I remember how easy I once had it.
      If life is a bowl of cherries, then why I am I stuck in the pits!

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      • #4
        One day at a time is how you must go on. I tell myself that every day - I have had this for 30 yrs - so you will make it - Also been through the depression cycle - pills,etc - you will make it through that.....

        We are all here for support - any help you need - please feel free to ask those of us who are here

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        • #5
          Kim, all of the above are correct. You must go one day at a time. You will make it and this is not necessarily going to be with you all your life. People do get better, it's just that there is no "cure" for dry eyes and it does take a long time for trial and error. Also, we never know when our bodies will heal the problem(s) which may be behind our particular dry eye.

          Diana is really very young--but is very mature with all that has happened to her. I don't know how she managed with all her problems with young children, only to have another during the "crisis." I thought she was nuts, but she really wanted a third child and she managed nicely.

          Sometimes it helps to take the problem outside yourself and see how others manage. (I know you are doing this.) By posting on this board (and others) you are "managing" your situation. I'm sure there were times we all felt that we'd die from our dry eyes, but no one ever has (to my knowledge) and I've been around boards for 9 years. Chin up! You'll find relief. Lucy
          Don't trust any refractive surgeon with YOUR eyes.

          The Dry Eye Queen

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          • #6
            Kim,

            I feel your pain, believe me I do!! I have been having a particularly rough week. The only thing that is keeping me going right now is hope and audio books!!

            I didn't know that this kind of pain was possible, but I just know I will find an answer. I have to. I hope you do to.

            HUGS!!

            MDE

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            • #7
              Kim, you've already been so brave and done a lot to tell people how you're feeling and seek help. Please DON'T give up. When you find the right treatment/right doctor/when it all comes together, you will appreciate everything so much more.

              A few weeks ago, at Moorfields eye hospital in London they gave someone back their sight, so if they can do that kind of miracle then I feel sure that there is an answer for us too.

              I'm sending courage to you!

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              • #8
                Thanks everyone

                Thanks everyone. I appreciate your kind words and wisdom. It is good to feel that I am not in this alone. Best wishes to everyone on this board.
                If life is a bowl of cherries, then why I am I stuck in the pits!

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