Just feeling so bummed

[lboogie]

Hi all,
Just a rant....and a little call for a shot of hope from my friends here. I've been feeling so very nostalgic and yearning for my pre-lasik life, and the person I was. I'm not sure if its just basic depression or the fatigue from the constant irritation, but I just find it so hard to find my get up and go/ and the motivation to do things I used to do, and love. Like jogging and being fit. Now everything is a decision about how my eyes feel.

14 months post-op and I'm just scared that this will last forever....

Thanks for listening everyone.

[jknueve]

Lacricerts

Iboogie,
I once felt the way you feel now. I urge you to give Lacricerts a try. They are the only thing that has helped me to have a normal life once again. If you are not familiar with what Lacricerts are, just google it. Best Wishes....

[liz56]

Hi, Lboogie.

I'm so sorry that you are feeling down,a nd I know how it is. Even though I have not had laser surgery on my eyes, I know about corneal pain and damage all too well, and I wish that I could go back to how things were before my corneal dystrophy made me aware of it with rce's.

I'm so glad that you mentioned fitness. I have been working out, doing some kind of aerobics just about every day since I was 25 (I'm 42 now). The summer when my rce's started, before they were properly diagnosed and treated, I was trying to treat myself. I put a patch on my eye and worked out, even though my eye hurt. I used the workouts to help me to push trough it, though it was not easy.

My big lesson, looking back, is that it takes the cornea a long time to heal. The setbacks are to be expected, but we have to hang in there.

--Liz

[Lucy]

Hi Laura-
I'm sorry you're feeling bad! Darn eyes. Sometimes don't you wish you could just take them out and hold them under the water faucet and then replace them? You are better by leaps and bounds from your beginning. You will get to the best for you eventually. Take care, Lucy
(freezing in Fla.)

[odydnas]

Iboogie, I completely understand what you mean when you say your eyes dictate your life. I am sorry to hear that you are so bummed out. I did not get Lasik, but it seems that many people on this board get better eventually. It may be very slow, but it will happen, and I believe that you will feel better.

[chickenlittle]

you will get better

Laura, hang in there.

I had to go on prozac because this whole lasik experience did depress me. It has helped. And just in the last month, I've had lot's of overflow of tears in my eyes - I've got full plugs in left and one full in bottom and flow control in top on right. I still get dry - last Sunday my eyes felt dry/irritated all day - but I was reading a book all day. At night they don't wake me up, but when I get up they are dry. I am working again 40+ hours at the computer with a heater right next to my desk and my eyes aren't really bothering me too much. I still see crappy - ie lights, but if I don't have to live with the pain, I will take it. I also started seeing crainosacral therapist - I think that has helped. I don't use any drops. I do take fish/flax oil. I have a mantra of "my eyes have the power to heal themselves" and I say it almost everyday. That's it. It has and it will get better.

[jlg_uk]

Now everything is a decision about how my eyes feel.

A sentence that I can very much identify with! - though I try to carry on doing things despite my eyes it's very hard.

Hang in there (lame motivational comment - need to come up with a better one!)

[autumnn]

I totally understand too......yesterday I got in a small car accident (backed into my own garage)- the reason was because I was so in my head about this pain and totally not concentrating- my anxiety was through the roof, today I have the car damage to prove it.

[elvishthistle]

I completely feel the same way...except I didn't have lasik and I STILL need glasses/contacts. The fight for contacts that work is frustrating. It's hard to be (seemingly) one of the only 24 yr olds that cannot wear contacts. It's like my eyes went down hill over night.

[LasikRelatedDES]

Hey lboogie,

I just wanted to chime in that I can totally relate. I was once a very confident, dynamic young business guy, shooting up the ladder. My blepharitis and MGD came on slowly after LASIK and when I look back on that slow spiral, I'm so mad at myself - for getting LASIK and for not seeking help sooner after symptoms started to emerge.

Careerwise, I'm not where I was before this all happened and sometimes all I want to have back is my bright disposition and confident manner. I'm torn up by frustration and anxiety at points throughout the day and sometimes it keeps me in my office when I should be out shaking hands and getting the work done. I hate it.

My hope comes from the fact that after only a few weeks on Restasis and Doxy, the intense burning is gone. The dryness and fullness under my eyes remains. But I still have hope. I pray you find a little hope too... that you'll be better than what you once were pre-LASIK because of this experience.

[eva b]

hey lboogie,

I, too, know just how you feel and so many of the others who have replied on your thread.

It is just so depressing that your eyes start to rule your whole life - it depresses the c**p out of me that I never know from one day to the next how they are going to be, so it's as if my life is totally on "hold" until....hopefully....one day they improve.

It totally, totally sucks,

[GinaJ]

I am sorry but can relate as well. I have other chronic health conditions as well and it is hard to face the day but I think reaching out for support is very helpful. Hang in there and though I know it feels lonely there are others that can relate.

[sazy123]

I completely feel the same way...except I didn't have lasik and I STILL need glasses/contacts. The fight for contacts that work is frustrating. It's hard to be (seemingly) one of the only 24 yr olds that cannot wear contacts. It's like my eyes went down hill over night.

Same here, but i couldnt wear them properly at 17! i think contacts also contribute to dry eye (theres a study somewhere), so you shouldnt try to wear them with dry eye imo.