Self-Conscious about Looks

[bigblues]

Hi All,

I have pinguecula in both my eyes. It is not very severe but enough for me to notice and obsess. I am a performer and have my picture taken occasionally and I have become so self-conscious. Last week I did a photo shoot for a play I am in and to me my pinguecula was so obvious in the photos. I am really practicing trying to accept my eyes how they are but there isn't a day that passes where I don't pray for it to go away so I can go back to looking "normal." I have been seriously considering surgery, although I can't afford it. I have a fear that my eyes are going to keep me from living my life and enjoying myself. Im already afraid to go out into the sun. Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated!

[calli66]

For close up publicity pictures, get the pinguecula "photoshopped" to diminish its appearance. Otherwise, people probably aren't going to notice this at all---they don't know what it is, and aren't looking for it like you are.

I know what pingueculas are, and only occasionally notice them on other people (like in stores)---only if they're huge or the eye is red/inflamed. And that's when I'm 2 feet away.

People look first at different things about others' appearances, depending on what they're comparing (to themselves)---shoes, hair, weight, number of wrinkles, degree of sagginess of neck skin (that's my thing), eyeglasses style, fakeness of eyebrow shaping, inappropriate makeup application, etc. And that's just women (I'm a woman). I'm more likely to notice pinguecula on a man---and since I live in the US Southwest, I usually think, "Hmmm, I bet this guy works outside in the sun and wind."

You gotta keep these things in perspective.

Calli

[Nanerpus]

I absolutely understand where you are coming from. I hate my pingeuculas, and like you, have them in both eyes. They are constantly getting red/inflamed and I feel foreign body sensation. I have to go on steroids occasionally because they get really inflamed. I would love to get rid of them, but my doctor says the surgery can cause worse problems by leaving scar tissue that looks and feels worse than the actual pingeucula.

I'm immensely self conscious about them. My husband and brother each have one, but didn't even know it until I looked in their eyes and pointed it out - but they don't have dry eyes so it never bothers them. I'm trying my best to keep the pingeuculas hydrated - when they aren't dry they are almost perfectly white and you don't even notice them - but that is a rare day

[iredeye]

i'm in the same boat. I did not noticed them until recently. now i'm really concern, but i guess i will have to live with it.

[Faith1989]

I can totally relate to this thread. I don't have pingeuculas but lots of surface inflammation which makes me not want to look at people and I feel like people notice. My family claims no one notices and my eyes aren't that red but feel they are compared to how they uses to be! The only time they look close to normal is when lotemax is used.

[cathy8889]

I am in same boat, my pinguecula have grown bigger over the last year and are always inflamed. I'm 27 and have had them since I was 20 but recently they have just become so noticeable to me. I feel like a 90 year old women and that everyone is noticing them! I am constantly looking at peoples eyes and cant watch a tv programme without thinking I wish my eyes were clear .

I have dry eyes too which makes them worse! I can't work out if my pinguecula are causing my dry eye sensation though? Does anybody know if they do? The first specialist I saw (who was absolutely useless) said that pings stop the tears spreading across your eye, but I dont know if this is accurate or not? I spoke to a lady who had surgery on her pinguecula and she said that her dry eye went away after her surgery. I'm totally confused by it! I am seeing another specialist on Tuesday who does a lot of surgery on pyterigium and I am hoping he can answer my questions.

Cath x

[Guest]

This will sound crazy, but in case it makes you guys feel any better, here goes...

Growing up I had a friend who had one of those on her eye - she was lucky in that it was never red and inflamed though. In any case, when I was a kid I thought it looked really cool - I swear I'm not kidding. As we got older, I honestly didn't think anything of it - it was just part of the overall picture of what made her look like herself. Not good, not bad... more of a neutral thing.