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I missed the two-year anniversary of my eye surgery because I was too depressed to write a post. So I thought I'd simultaneously update you-all on how things are going as well as weighing in on a couple of subjects that are near-and-dear to me and that have come up recently here on DEZ.
First, I want to thank everyone here. I tell everyone about the wonderful people I've met on my "online dry eye support group," and they are usually surprised to hear that there is such a thing. My friends seem to think that I'm a freak and the only person in the world to have gone through this ordeal. It's no exaggeration to say that this site and the people here have saved my sanity, if not my life, and I'm so thankful for every one of you.
Two years ago, I had PRK to correct my nearsightedness. I developed severe dry eyes post-surgery. It took a year of RCE-induced insomnia and five ophthalmologists before I began to get any relief. I was severely depressed, as well, and I was lucky to find a good therapist along with my great ophthalmologist (and dry eye specialist). I really believed that once my eye pain was under control that my depression would disappear. So I didn't treat it as seriously as I should have; I saw it as an adjunct to my eye problems.
A few months after starting my eye doc's daily regimen (warm compresses, restasis, minocycline, massive amounts of omega-3's, lid scrubs, autologous serum, Genteal Gel, Panoptx/goggles, punctal plugs, humidifier at home), I had about a 50% reduction in my daily eye pain and the RCE's stopped completely (hooray! I haven't had an RCE in about 15 months!). I found a medication that helped me sleep, and once I was sleeping through the night on a regular basis (sans-RCE's), my eyes improved a little bit more.
But nothing helped the depression. I tried eight anti-depressants, and they either didn't lift my mood or they dried my eyes terribly. I was actively suicidal for more than a year, and for those of you who have been to that place, you know what a burden that is, not only for me but for everyone in my support network.
About a month ago, I started a new depression treatment: ECT (Electro-Convulsive Therapy). It has been like a miracle cure for me. The depression is completely gone, and I am sleeping deeply every night. I have experienced a marked improvement in my eyes since starting ECT, as well. On a 1-10 scale, where 1 is very little pain and 10 is RCE-type pain, I have been averaging 1-3 for the last several weeks, and I spend the majority of the day with nearly no discomfort at all.
In a nutshell, here is what has helped my eyes the most:
1. Panoptx -- these glasses allow me to go places and do things that I absolutely could not do without them
2. autologous serum -- when I started the serum, I was using about 5-8 vials of artificial tears/day; now I don't use any!
3. my daily routine/my eye doc -- following this time-consuming routine every day for months and months is the key, I think
4. ECT/sleep -- getting the depression under control has had a huge effect on my eyes (depression seems to make everything hurt more), and there's just no overstating the importance of good, restful sleep
5. my support group -- my husband and my dry eye friends
It has taken me 2+ years to get this problem under control, and I still have so much work to do. But I have had major improvements. It took me a long, long time (too long!) to assemble the team of doctors who are treating me now (psychologist, ophthalmologist, 2 psychiatrists, family doc), but they are all great and all contributing to my improvements. If your doctor is not helping you or listening to you, find a new one! Keep looking until you find someone great. Great doctors are out there, and you deserve someone who is at the top of their game and who will be a compassionate caregiver.
Nearly everyone who has seen me in the last few weeks has commented on how good I look, how I'm smiling (I think I went a long time without smiling or laughing), and it just reinforces how pernicious depression is. When you're down in it, you don't realize the toll it is taking on you or how, apparently, everyone is noticing. Please, if this is you, ask for help from those around you.
Most of all, hang in there. I feel that I've turned a corner, but I have to keep working to make these changes permanent. Thanks again to Rebecca and everyone here who has been so supportive and helpful. And here's hoping for no major setbacks!
Teri
First, I want to thank everyone here. I tell everyone about the wonderful people I've met on my "online dry eye support group," and they are usually surprised to hear that there is such a thing. My friends seem to think that I'm a freak and the only person in the world to have gone through this ordeal. It's no exaggeration to say that this site and the people here have saved my sanity, if not my life, and I'm so thankful for every one of you.
Two years ago, I had PRK to correct my nearsightedness. I developed severe dry eyes post-surgery. It took a year of RCE-induced insomnia and five ophthalmologists before I began to get any relief. I was severely depressed, as well, and I was lucky to find a good therapist along with my great ophthalmologist (and dry eye specialist). I really believed that once my eye pain was under control that my depression would disappear. So I didn't treat it as seriously as I should have; I saw it as an adjunct to my eye problems.
A few months after starting my eye doc's daily regimen (warm compresses, restasis, minocycline, massive amounts of omega-3's, lid scrubs, autologous serum, Genteal Gel, Panoptx/goggles, punctal plugs, humidifier at home), I had about a 50% reduction in my daily eye pain and the RCE's stopped completely (hooray! I haven't had an RCE in about 15 months!). I found a medication that helped me sleep, and once I was sleeping through the night on a regular basis (sans-RCE's), my eyes improved a little bit more.
But nothing helped the depression. I tried eight anti-depressants, and they either didn't lift my mood or they dried my eyes terribly. I was actively suicidal for more than a year, and for those of you who have been to that place, you know what a burden that is, not only for me but for everyone in my support network.
About a month ago, I started a new depression treatment: ECT (Electro-Convulsive Therapy). It has been like a miracle cure for me. The depression is completely gone, and I am sleeping deeply every night. I have experienced a marked improvement in my eyes since starting ECT, as well. On a 1-10 scale, where 1 is very little pain and 10 is RCE-type pain, I have been averaging 1-3 for the last several weeks, and I spend the majority of the day with nearly no discomfort at all.
In a nutshell, here is what has helped my eyes the most:
1. Panoptx -- these glasses allow me to go places and do things that I absolutely could not do without them
2. autologous serum -- when I started the serum, I was using about 5-8 vials of artificial tears/day; now I don't use any!
3. my daily routine/my eye doc -- following this time-consuming routine every day for months and months is the key, I think
4. ECT/sleep -- getting the depression under control has had a huge effect on my eyes (depression seems to make everything hurt more), and there's just no overstating the importance of good, restful sleep
5. my support group -- my husband and my dry eye friends
It has taken me 2+ years to get this problem under control, and I still have so much work to do. But I have had major improvements. It took me a long, long time (too long!) to assemble the team of doctors who are treating me now (psychologist, ophthalmologist, 2 psychiatrists, family doc), but they are all great and all contributing to my improvements. If your doctor is not helping you or listening to you, find a new one! Keep looking until you find someone great. Great doctors are out there, and you deserve someone who is at the top of their game and who will be a compassionate caregiver.
Nearly everyone who has seen me in the last few weeks has commented on how good I look, how I'm smiling (I think I went a long time without smiling or laughing), and it just reinforces how pernicious depression is. When you're down in it, you don't realize the toll it is taking on you or how, apparently, everyone is noticing. Please, if this is you, ask for help from those around you.
Most of all, hang in there. I feel that I've turned a corner, but I have to keep working to make these changes permanent. Thanks again to Rebecca and everyone here who has been so supportive and helpful. And here's hoping for no major setbacks!
Teri
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