Relatively New Dry Eye Sufferer

[kandykane1544]

Hi everybody,
My name is Stevie and I am from the Midwest. Last January, I returned from a trip to the Caribbean and shortly after woke up one morning to a gritty, dry left eye. There were also 2 new veins coming from the inside corner of my eye toward the iris. At first I was more focused on the cosmetic look of the veins, and would occasionally put drops in my left eye to alleviate the gritty sensation. Well, fast forward 8-9 months and here I am. I recently went to an opthomalogist and was diagnosed with posterior blepharitis and MGD. I have never had any "health problems" before, I have always been relatively healthy (played sports, exercised regularly), I don't have allergies, and I have never had contacts or vision problems of any sort. This disease has undoubtedly become the most frustrating and depression situation I've ever experienced. I just turned 20 and recently transferred to a new University. As excited as I was to attend my new "dream school," I was unaware I'd be forced to bring this dreadful disease along with me. I have always taken pride in my school work, and have always been a very good student. However, by night time my eyes often bother me so much that it is hard to stay on top of my work like my "old self" would. It is also extremely difficult being surrounded by a bunch of college students who are always looking to have all sorts of fun and have no interest or understanding of such a simple (yet ridiculously complex) term as dry eye disease.
I don't just feel sorry for myself, I can be honest I have been pretty depressed lately, I also feel sorry for my family. They know I am in a lot of pain and they are aware this disease is greatly affecting my quality of life, and it makes me sad because as much as they care there and as badly as they would like to alleviate my physical pain there isn't anything they can do. However, I know I should count my blessings and feel grateful for having such a wonderful support system to help me through this. This is getting pretty long haha but most of all I would just like to know why this is happening/why it triggered in the first place. My opthamologist tells me not to get caught up in trying to know why, but I can't stand that mindset. One minute my eyes never crossed my mind, next thing I know they are never off of it. I am going to see an allergist next week as well as a rheumatologist, but having already read lots of other peoples posts I don't have much hope that these doctors will be able to help explain what is going wrong. Anyway, I'm done venting for now ha...that's what this place is for though, right? But I look forward to getting to know all of you and helping others and myself learn how to cope with this subtle yet unbelievably impacting disease.

[bakunin]

Truly "unbelievably impacting disease". Only those who have it can believe.

I wish you get better soon.

[Rebecca Petris]

KK1544, welcome. Glad you're here, though sorry you have reason to be.

This is getting pretty long haha but most of all I would just like to know why this is happening/why it triggered in the first place. My opthamologist tells me not to get caught up in trying to know why, but I can't stand that mindset.

What I would say to that is: Do keep your eyes/ears peeled for information that will eventually bring an answer, but DON'T obsess about it. It isn't always 'knowable'. I think your doctor is right in the sense that it is more important to understand exactly what is wrong and how to go about changing it, but you're right to want to know what caused, or is causing it in that it may bring clues to some steps for treatment & prevention. The main thing is that hunt for a cause should not be allowed to interfere with getting solutions.

I talk with people all the time about how their eye situation started. Sometimes it really seems like it was out of a clear blue sky. But often when you hear the stories you can see the same sort of pattern: some mild "subclinical" conditions going on that they didn't have any really bothersome symptoms from so they weren't aware there was anything wrong, then some temporary trigger such as an eye infection or scratch or something which is treated and gets better, then either gradually or all of a sudden they're in dry eye hell. What I'm getting at is that when it happens to people who are generally healthy, it's usually a combination of factors.

Don't let depression get out of hand before you consider treating that in its own right. It's something most people with dry eye have to deal with sooner or later.

Do you have tools to help keep you comfortable in a school environment?

You're not wearing contacts are you?

[kandykane1544]

KK1544, welcome. Glad you're here, though sorry you have reason to be.



What I would say to that is: Do keep your eyes/ears peeled for information that will eventually bring an answer, but DON'T obsess about it. It isn't always 'knowable'. I think your doctor is right in the sense that it is more important to understand exactly what is wrong and how to go about changing it, but you're right to want to know what caused, or is causing it in that it may bring clues to some steps for treatment & prevention. The main thing is that hunt for a cause should not be allowed to interfere with getting solutions.

I talk with people all the time about how their eye situation started. Sometimes it really seems like it was out of a clear blue sky. But often when you hear the stories you can see the same sort of pattern: some mild "subclinical" conditions going on that they didn't have any really bothersome symptoms from so they weren't aware there was anything wrong, then some temporary trigger such as an eye infection or scratch or something which is treated and gets better, then either gradually or all of a sudden they're in dry eye hell. What I'm getting at is that when it happens to people who are generally healthy, it's usually a combination of factors.

Don't let depression get out of hand before you consider treating that in its own right. It's something most people with dry eye have to deal with sooner or later.

Do you have tools to help keep you comfortable in a school environment?

You're not wearing contacts are you?

Thanks for responding so quickly! But no I do not wear contacts, I have always had good vision and luckily still do. As for my tools at school, my Opthamologist prescribed me restasis and lotemax. I use the restasis once but rarely twice a day. As for the lotemax, I use that only 2 nights a week because of the risks involved with its continued use. I apply cold compresses/ice at night when the inflammation starts to get worse. I have also began using azasite which seems to be helping with my lid inflammation.
My mom recommended I go see a psychologist and I made an appointment which I think is a good move. I have done countless hours of research on dry eye disease, blepharitis, MGD, etc. and I understand that my "researching habits" aren't very healthy, but I've got this "fix it" mentality in my head and its sometimes difficult for me to stop. I think it's important though that I use my research time more effectively, like for finding a more caring/up-to-date opthamologist and trying to identify which subtype of the disease I fall into.

A few questions I have though, my current opthamologist is hard to reach and whenever I am in his office I feel like his foot is already half way out the door before we even start our conversation. I always overlooked going to optometrists because I thought they were less qualified, but in your opinion what would be the best way to find a doctor (in the chicagoland area) that I can really talk to and have a detailed discussion with?

[hankm9]

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[kandykane1544]

Thanks hankm, I will look into it. Your demodex thread sounds very interesting, as for the E-PRP drops, they sound very intriguing. But I feel that if I went to my opthamologist saying I would blood serum drops he would say, "No your eyes are not severe enough for that." ESPECIALLY with dry eyes, I feel the patients should be the judgers of that, end of story. I might travel to Florida and see Dr. ****** and Dr. Tseng all at once. I have heard great things about the gland probe procedure, and I also believe that if demodex mites or some other form of bacteria are the cause, the probing should help "speed up" their elimination.
It's funny you say you are at school as well, ha unfortunately I find myself on this website and doing research more often than I am doing school work (a habit I should definitely try and change). Keep in touch

[hankm9]

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