Copying with boredom

[justbob]

Any suggestions? I'm so bored and lonely (don't drive and nothing much around here) all the time now I can't use my eyes freely

[Nightbird]

Hi Bob,

When my eyes were at their worst I found audiobooks to be a big help. You can download them to your phone and listen anywhere. And you can do it with your eyes closed. I also kept in touch with friends that I couldn't see much by having long phone conversations. You can do it with Skype to keep the cost down, just use it without the video.

[littlemermaid]

People here over the years have found comfort and an antidote to depression by joining community groups either for health, spirituality, or volunteering to help others. It's been a big help to us to join with other people surviving other issues for mutual support. Regular meetings/activities/appointments, at least weekly, have been important. Didn't matter what for as long as it's helpful and empowering, and we contribute our fair share and feel respected and valued, and there's 'safety in numbers'.

What hasn't worked is to wait till we feel OK before we go out, but rather to prepare to go out so we can manage. It's been very much easier with other people since junior got a Medical ID bracelet, for example, although even a pinbadge does it. Plus stock of meds and contact list.

Sometimes we just have to create our own opportunities, and share that. For us, it's playing musical instruments, choirs and music groups, children's activities, cognitive behaviour therapy and mindfulness, hill walking where we live. Being with other people particularly helped with social isolation within the family from me losing work and huge amounts of time and money, and the 'stages of grief' for both of us - 1 shock and denial, 2 anger and depression, 3 acceptance and integration.

The awful pressure that we 'ought' to be doing this or that, or it's our fault but we didn't know at the time, is very damaging to self-confidence. We replaced that by looking for, and appreciating, good personal things daily, as you are doing. You have my great respect for how you are managing. It was very important to accept and respect ourselves as we are, and be proud of anything we achieve, so we can find our own way forward.

You've got us too, justbob, and this community cares about you. Hope you feel better soon. Sorry that doesn't answer your question too well... hopefully people will post to tell us what they do.

[littlemermaid]

Hope you're getting good, positive PMs etc, justbob, but if anyone responds who is feeling very sad or down or doesn't know where to turn, we can give them links to NHS website http://www.nhs.uk/conditions/stress-...epression.aspx and http://www.mind.org.uk/?gclid=CPamvo...FdPKtAod3gUAJg so they find their local contacts and groups and get safe. It's very important we help each other look for solutions, and post about good times and successes, and hear how people worldwide have found kind supportive groups and self-help for doing well.