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I’m 28 and going through the hardest time of my life, and I’m still not out of it. My biggest fear is to loose more glands.. im afraid they die everyday and that I will loose them all in like two years....
I’ve had dry eyes for 2–3 years, but I didn’t discover Meibomian Gland Dysfunction (MGD) until 2025. Thankfully, my case is mild. All my gland loss is located in the lower left eyelid, where I’ve completely lost 2 glands, and have 4 more that are very short (about 20–25% of normal length). My doctors believe those 4 short glands are still functional, and can remain that way for a long time with proper care. So while only 2 are truly gone, I estimate the “effective loss” at around 5.
Here’s the full picture:
• Upper left eyelid: 100% intact • Lower left eyelid: 2 lost glands + 4 very short, but still active • Upper right eyelid: 100% intact • Lower right eyelid: 2 (50-60% length) glands – no gland loss
Approx:
90% glands left/function in LEFT eye 95% glands left/function in RIGHT eye
The specialists I’ve seen are among the best in my country, and they all agree: ✅ I can live a good, normal life with this ✅ I will not suffer long-term if I stay consistent with care ✅ With proper treatment, glands do not die quickly ✅ My condition is stable , not dangerous, and very manageable ✅ I’ve made good progress, and now have healthy oil flow from the glands
Also for context: ️ I wore contact lenses for 8–9 years, but stopped 2 years ago. I also stopped using hormonal birth control. Maybe too much screen time..
Despite all this good news, I live in constant fear.
I follow every treatment plan with discipline: • IPL • LLLT • MGE • Ikervis (2x daily) Mucosta x3 • Artificial tears (4–6x daily) • Warm compresses (2x daily) • Excellent hygiene • No inflammation • No blepharitis
And yet, I feel trapped. I’m even afraid to use my eyes. Reading, screens, being outdoors, socializing – they all trigger anxiety. Exercise. It feels like every blink could make things worse, even though my doctors insist that’s not how it works.
Here’s the hardest part: The pain I feel isn’t in the eye. It’s mostly in the mucosal (mucus membrane) tissue – the conjunctiva. My doctors believe this is neurosensory pain – caused by an overactive nervous system, not tissue damage. They believe my brain is amplifying normal sensations due to fear and chronic hyperfocus. They believe this will diminish over time.
Still… the sensations are real. Even knowing that most of my glands are intact, I cry over the two I’ve lost. I feel guilt, panic, hopelessness – and the only temporary relief I get is from Sobril (a benzo), but I don’t want that to be my crutch.
So I’m asking:
Has anyone else gone through this – and come out okay? • Has your condition stayed stable over time? The glands being stable and not dying? • Have you learned to live, to relax, to use your eyes again? • Have you become a parent, grown older, or even forgotten about your eyes sometimes?
I want to believe what all the best doctors tell me:
“You’re okay. You’ve done everything right. Your eyes are in good condition. It’s time to live again.”
But fear is hard to quiet. If you’ve been where I am, please tell me how you found peace. How long have you been stable? Can you go days without thinking about your eyes? How did you start trusting your body again?
I’ve had dry eyes for 2–3 years, but I didn’t discover Meibomian Gland Dysfunction (MGD) until 2025. Thankfully, my case is mild. All my gland loss is located in the lower left eyelid, where I’ve completely lost 2 glands, and have 4 more that are very short (about 20–25% of normal length). My doctors believe those 4 short glands are still functional, and can remain that way for a long time with proper care. So while only 2 are truly gone, I estimate the “effective loss” at around 5.
Here’s the full picture:
• Upper left eyelid: 100% intact • Lower left eyelid: 2 lost glands + 4 very short, but still active • Upper right eyelid: 100% intact • Lower right eyelid: 2 (50-60% length) glands – no gland loss
Approx:
90% glands left/function in LEFT eye 95% glands left/function in RIGHT eye
The specialists I’ve seen are among the best in my country, and they all agree: ✅ I can live a good, normal life with this ✅ I will not suffer long-term if I stay consistent with care ✅ With proper treatment, glands do not die quickly ✅ My condition is stable , not dangerous, and very manageable ✅ I’ve made good progress, and now have healthy oil flow from the glands
Also for context: ️ I wore contact lenses for 8–9 years, but stopped 2 years ago. I also stopped using hormonal birth control. Maybe too much screen time..
Despite all this good news, I live in constant fear.
I follow every treatment plan with discipline: • IPL • LLLT • MGE • Ikervis (2x daily) Mucosta x3 • Artificial tears (4–6x daily) • Warm compresses (2x daily) • Excellent hygiene • No inflammation • No blepharitis
And yet, I feel trapped. I’m even afraid to use my eyes. Reading, screens, being outdoors, socializing – they all trigger anxiety. Exercise. It feels like every blink could make things worse, even though my doctors insist that’s not how it works.
Here’s the hardest part: The pain I feel isn’t in the eye. It’s mostly in the mucosal (mucus membrane) tissue – the conjunctiva. My doctors believe this is neurosensory pain – caused by an overactive nervous system, not tissue damage. They believe my brain is amplifying normal sensations due to fear and chronic hyperfocus. They believe this will diminish over time.
Still… the sensations are real. Even knowing that most of my glands are intact, I cry over the two I’ve lost. I feel guilt, panic, hopelessness – and the only temporary relief I get is from Sobril (a benzo), but I don’t want that to be my crutch.
So I’m asking:
Has anyone else gone through this – and come out okay? • Has your condition stayed stable over time? The glands being stable and not dying? • Have you learned to live, to relax, to use your eyes again? • Have you become a parent, grown older, or even forgotten about your eyes sometimes?
I want to believe what all the best doctors tell me:
“You’re okay. You’ve done everything right. Your eyes are in good condition. It’s time to live again.”
But fear is hard to quiet. If you’ve been where I am, please tell me how you found peace. How long have you been stable? Can you go days without thinking about your eyes? How did you start trusting your body again?
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