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  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Welcome

    Marty

    I read your story this morning and found that I was a mess by the time I got to the end of it.

    I am extremely saddened by your story yet angry that another person has been added to the questionable statistics list as a result of this surgery.

    I had lasek 13 months ago and have had dry eye ever since. My story is posted here there are some great suggestions from others that have helped me on my journey.

    Like you (and most of us here with laser induced dry eyes) we blame ourselves for our decision to have the surgery in the first place. The problem with this theory is, we didn't chose this outcome, the decision has been made, and unfortunately, we can't go back and revisit it, so we just have to learn to redirect our energy into accepting it and fight to get out lives back on track.

    I have spent countless hours wrestling with my decision to have this but soon found that investing energy into beating myself up wasn't going to yield any dividends.

    I am so glad that you found this site and have every confidence that people here will be able to provide you with some guidance and more importantly support.

    On those moments when you feel it getting a little tough for you, pop onto this site for a visit, there are always inspirational stories floating around that give you that little glimmer of hope that you are looking for at that moment in time.

    If you don't find the inspiration here you need to find it somewhere - look inside yourself, look in the eyes of your little boy and I am sure you will find all the fight you need to help you move on, don't ever give in.

    I think it is important to get your family involved, I provided Diana's story to some of my family and friends to help them appreciate what we are dealing with.

    Most importantly I think we need to stand on the shoulders of the people that have walked this road before us. We can benefit from their guidance and inspiration to get us through this. We have the added benefit of learning from their mistakes and their trial and tribulations.

    Hang in there, this is a tough journey but we are all here to support each other on this journey.

    My thoughts are with you

    Ian

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  • dianat
    replied
    Marty,

    Your post really hit me hard. You are exactly where I was four years ago. Exactly. I had two kids and stong urges to have another. Then I had LASIK and my whole life fell apart. I was a wreck and could barely get out of bed. It took me a good long time to mentally find a good place...years really. I also found a bit of manageablity for my eyes. They are still horrible, but I have found what keeps the burning at bay. This has been key to my getting on with life.

    Regarding the depression, I have had to resort to antidepressants in the last four years since LASIK. I had tapered off and back on for years. They did help, but I never really wanted to stay on them if I could help it. When I decided to have another baby last year, I tapered off and managed to stay off. I've been without them for well over a year now. This is HUGE considering there were many, many days where I couldn't even get up to take care of myself or my kids.

    Our choices are we can hope for sudden death or a fatal accident, or we can push on for the sake of those who love and need us. Eventually, you'll realize you are pushing on for sake of yourself, too. Keep the faith, Marty. Lean on whoever is available to you. Find ways to pull yourself out. Get some antidepressants for starters. This will help you get moving and will allow you the energy to find ways to help yourself. Dig deep on this site for what people do on a daily basis to keep their eyes as comfortable as possible.

    Eventually, too, you'll need to lose the guilt about having had LASIK. I did not understand in the slightest what kind of risk there was with LASIK. The industry lied to us, Marty, and continues to do it to people every day. The guilt you are feeling is wasted energy. I have also chosen not to hate all LASIK doctors or even my own. I just don't have enough energy or nastiness to even carry that kind of weight.

    I'm hesitant to suggest this, but my story titled "Diana's story" is stickied at the top of the "Your Dry Eye Story" forum.

    http://www.dryeyezone.com/talk/showthread.php?t=53

    I wrote it when I was probably in your condition as opposed to my more collected self today. I have had more than one person tell me that they let family members read it and it helped them understand the dry eye condition far better than they were able to express it themselves. If you read it, you'll probably identify with it. Let family members read it as well. They'll understand a lot more about your condition once they have.

    I will also pray for your healing. It will start with some faith, but will be mostly your doing. You will be very proud of yourself when you find that you've managed through such a difficult time. And you will get better. Maybe you'll end up back in nursing school, maybe you'll hold off for a while. Perhaps you'll have another baby. All this is possible with dry, LASIK eyes.

    Take good care,

    Diana Telles



    Regarding your

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  • Judy
    replied
    Marty,

    I am saddened by your post and just said a prayer for your healing, both for your eyes and as well as your spirit. As the others have mentioned, there are many helpful posts discussing different products and routines you can do to help with the dryness, pain, redness, etc. The one thing that I just started doing was rinsing my eyes in the shower first thing in the morning with Unisol saline (non-preservative). It really feels heavenly. You have so much life ahead of you and have a marriage and a beautiful (I'm sure) baby boy. Keep the faith. Things will get better. And please get to a Dr (even if it is your family physician) for depression. You will be able to talk to them (since you struggle discussing this with your Hubby) and they can help you! An opthamologist would be an excellent idea as well if you haven't gone lately. God Bless! Judy
    Last edited by Judy; 17-Nov-2006, 05:21.

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  • Silverlady
    replied
    Get some help

    Marty,
    We all understand what you are going thru. There are a lot of people here suffering from the dry eye situation and some of them have had lasix also. Please talk to your family doctor about the depression you have. This is a lot to bear and maybe you need some help getting thru it.

    There are a lot of things you can do to help you manage your eyes. Have you read thru the back posts? And have you seen a specialist to make sure there isn't something else wrong with your eyes?

    Keep posting. We care.

    Billye

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  • calli66
    replied
    Dear Clintsmommy Marty

    You sound so sad. I hope you can find some support here and come to know you are not alone, and that people here truly understand how you feel.

    You are full of despair--please ask for a doctor's help--for the depression. I don't know what else to say, but I am glad you found Dry Eye Talk. This forum has really helped me. I visit here everyday, even if I don't post. It's my tie to hope, to practical methods and products, to knowledge.

    Calli

    Leave a comment:


  • clintsmommy
    started a topic Feeling down

    Feeling down

    Hello.... My name is Marty. I am a 24 year old female who has suffered with dry eye for awhile now. I started wearing contact lens at 14 and I tolerated them ok for a few years. They usually were ok until the end of the day, then they felt dry. In the past 2 or 3 years, I had to alternate days with contacts and glasses, because the contacts were starting to bother my eyes. I decided to have Lasik in September 2005. The doctor told me that the Lasik would not make my dry eyes worse, so I had it done. It has been over a year now. As far as my vision goes, I can see good, 20/20, but the dryness is a different story.

    I cry as I write this because I still can not believe that I have dry eye and how much of an impact this has had on me. I have always had mild depression, but having dry eye has been devastating. People who do not have it have no idea what kind of hell it is. I think about it all the time. I feel very alone, because none of my family understands, and besides, what can they do? I do not want to make them feel bad. I feel such shame because my husband and I paid so much for this surgery, and now I am in worse shape. I feel like I can not talk to him about either. I have bottles of eye drops all over the house, and my 2 year old little boy knows exactly what they are for. When I put drops in my eyes, he is always wanting me to put some in his too. I pretend to put some in his eyes, then when he goes out of the room, I burst into tears. I seem to do that alot. My eyes would get so dry that I would think of something sad to make me tear up for some relief. I do not have to do that now. I can tear up at the drop of a hat. My emotions are such a mess. The only reason I have kept it together is for my little boy. I deal with things that are just crazy. I love shopping, but I can not go because malls, and other stores like Wal-Mart and Lowes dry my eyes out like crazy. I have to go to Wal-Mart, but I do it really fast, and I do not look at people in the eye because I know they are beet red and people think I am on drugs. God I do not know how I deal with this... My future does not look bright. I would love to work in a hospital, but they dry my eyes out too. I quit nursing school because of my eyes. I am not able to carry on a conversation with people very well because I am always thinking about my eyes. This disease has been devastating to me, and the sad thing is that its my fault, I really can blame no one, not God, not the doctors, nobody but me. I am paying for my vanity. My coping skills are not the greatest right now, I am really down. It puts alot of extra stress on me, beside worrying about normal things, like bills , taking care of my son, etc.. I do not let my son or anyone else see my cry, but I do cry alot. I have thought about killing myself alot, but I just can't leave my son without a mother. If it were not for him, who knows? Like I said, I keep it together for him.
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